A gift; it glowed like a light on water, reflecting and spreading. My emotions and thoughts; the weight that had been clinging to my shoulders. Anger that had clawed at my insides. Pain that had echoed throughout my skull. I took another step across the plains of space; the openness – a blessing in disguise.
My feet were light on the soft ground; my body moved smoothly, elegant footsteps the previous rigid movements disappearing with every step. Beginning to stumble, my legs were weak, yet I carried on – needing to be there.
I sat in the shadow that was waiting for me having ran the last few steps. I sunk down: damp cool grassy ground. As my body made contact with the earth; i cried. I bought my knees up to my chest and buried my head in my hands. Reasons were beyond my reach.
I no longer needed anything, except... this.
I cried like a child in sobs of pain. I wanted to scream for help but I knew nobody would hear. So I continued to sit in pain and anguish.
As I began to calm I stared around at the beautiful place, feeling each word as I wrote. I know this place; it’s the place I left my heart when I didn’t know what to do. It’s the place I can find my heart when I don’t know where to go. But; somehow when I am here, I am the heart. Purely the heart beating at the centre of the universe with nothing else to hurt me. Nothing.
As my body began to grow cold I still did not move; I still wanted to sit in my place in the world. The place where I belonged.
Thoughts of leaving, dropping my bags, the weights on my soul, my life. Wanting to run, leave it all behind and never come back. I want my legs to carry me, carry me far, far away, where I cannot be found ever again.
perfect.
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